“I don’t want to go,” Kathy remembers saying.
Years and years ago, kids and teenagers did what their parents told them because they believed that parents knew what was right and wrong. There was never any questions or backtalk, you shut up and dealt with it. After all, wasn’t your best interests their responsibility and intent?
Kathy wanted that to be true. She never thought for one minute that her own mother or father would deliberately put her in harm’s way. But hurt her they did, and never for one minute did they think they did the wrong thing.
Parenting is precarious at best. Instead of using truths, parents lean on their own understanding of whatever issue is at hand. Parents ‘parent’ with what they think they know is true, not necessarily with the Truth. More on that later…
Kathy, like just about every teenager, thought that she can handle being more of a grown up than she really was. Sex is always the biggie – the one thing that every teen thinks they can deal with like an adult. Kathy had to find out the hard way how much responsibility goes with having a ‘sex life’.
Like millions of teens out there, Kathy listened to what her mom and dad said about sex, whether they knew Kathy was listening or not. There were already two strikes against her: Kathy’s father had a sex and pornography addiction; her mother was still looking for some man to financially take care of her, even if it took breaking up marriages to do it. It was easy to see that having sex had absolutely no consequences, according to the example that Kathy’s mom and dad set.
Playing with matches eventually starts a fire. Kathy got pregnant. And somehow, her parents were surprised.
Kathy’s father was missing in action, again, so the situation was placed in her mom’s lap. Because this pregnancy happened so soon after Roe was passed, it was an easy decision for Kathy’s mom – abortion.
In the ‘70’s, abortion was still very blurry. What was abortion? How does abortion help or fix being pregnant, Kathy wondered. She listened to what her mom said, “It’s not a baby yet. Don’t worry, it won’t hurt and only takes a few minutes…I promise.”
Those ‘few minutes’ has lasted over 32 years.
Kathy’s mom was still ‘living her life’ – don’t do as I do mentality. Was Kathy forced to be smarter than her mother? It seemed insinuated so. Sex was made out to be a means to an end instead of being between a man and woman joined in the Holy Covenant of Marriage. When a parent purposely lives an unholy life out loud in front of her children, what kind of outcome does one expect? How can you expect a different result?
“I don’t want to go,” Kathy remembers saying. Abortion. “What is abortion and why should I have to have one,” Kathy thought. None of this made a bit of sense. Kathy’s mom was getting angry, “Most of my friends have had abortions, you aren’t any more special than they are.” That was a hard thing for Kathy to hear. In Kathy’s mom’s desperation of not being a grandmother in her late thirties, she would start to generalize how unimportant a blob of tissue is – her grandchild – and how it was good enough for her friends to abort; all of them, apparently. In her mom’s relentless pursuit of being a single woman that looked good for her age, her daughter’s pregnancy was a huge blow to her ego and plans to one day marry well. Men of means wouldn’t like the stigma of marrying into a family that has an illegitimate child or grandchild.
The precariousness of parenting manifests the ugliest things. Did God figure in to the decision to abort? It would have if Kathy’s parents knew the Lord. Would that have changed the decision to make Kathy abort? It should.
“I don’t want to go,” Kathy remembers saying.
The problem with parents is that every one of them thinks they are doing it right. If the parent is gay, then the son or daughter will be taught to be gay-friendly. If the parent is unmarried, it will teach the son or daughter that marriage is unimportant. If a parent is a drug user, it will teach the son or daughter that drug use is acceptable. If the parent has had an abortion, it teaches the son or daughter that abortion is always an option.
But what if the parents are Christians that teach the Bible to their children and pray? No one can possibly know how to be a parent without knowing the Lord and the Bible. God gave us the text book to parenting, it’s called the Bible.
Kathy was forced to abort her unborn child. Her mother never looked back calling the abortion a good decision. And it was; for her mother. Kathy has to live her aborted life every day while her mother lives her life never thinking about her dead grandchild.
The aborted life of Kathy is just one story of over 55+ million moms in the United States that lost a child. Kathy lives every day knowing that her first child was murdered from a legal procedure known as abortion. Abortion kills unborn children everyday as an elective procedure – about 4000 unborn babies die each day from a deliberate murderous act that can be prevented.
Don’t be Kathy. Even she doesn’t want to be her.